Within my blog, I have written an article where I have talked about the time I was sexually assaulted (21 years the trigger). Recently I wrote the below poem going over how survivors like my self still live with the pain of the act. In my case, I got no justice yet I can still suffer from the cruel act that was forced upon me.
Although there are periods where you do forget (time heals to a degree), the slightest thing in life can soon bring the memories and shame back. Only recently I completed a 10k run where a complimentary massage was on offer at the end of the run. How I wanted one but I simply could not allow a man to touch me, even in a public place with friends around me and with knowing deep down, that he would not harm me. This then leads to the memories and pain of what happened to role back.
You also become frustrated because you do not want to relive the attack and go through the emotional rollercoaster again.
Life sentence from an unwanted act
Why do I have the life sentence
for I did no wrong but to trust?
A forced violation upon me lives
with me for my remaining years.
A vile act I wanted no part off
haunts my past, present and future.
The slightest thing can rush forward
the horrid memories from that one
He walks free and gets away with it
yet I walk with the burden hanging
over me from what he did!
I made no bad mistake but I pay
the price for sins forced upon me.
No mater how innocent the event is, it could my scenario above or maybe something on the TV, the anguish, torment and pain that this person has caused can bring all that suffering back. I am of course writing about my experience but from speaking to other victims and survivors of sexual violence, this is a common sentence for any victim.
For help with male sexual violence visit https://www.survivorsuk.org/
If you are a woman that can also relate but require help please visit https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/crime-info/types-crime/rape-and-sexual-assault
End note* What ever you do, speak up! I did but it was too late! If you are a law maker, push for tighter sentences for vile, disgusting human beings who cause such affliction upon another human being.